We are attracted to those people that we have to learn with and learn through. Most of our early relationships are deeply karmic.
The Other serves as a mirror for what it is that we need to heal and what we are being called to empower within us.
We can to stop looking for the right partner, and instead work on becoming the right partner.”
When we understand that marriage is the arena where we can go to meet Spirit face-to-face, and when we practice deep gratitude for all of those difficult lessons that our partner is offering us, then we can truly evolve our relationship.
If we insist on making the other wrong, we dig ourselves deeper into our ditch. Our task is not to look for someone who is going to be more like us, but to find the person that we can commit to being on a healing journey with. Someone whith whom self discovery and deepening is a priority. And that their actions demonstrate that to be a walking embodied truth across different areas of life that we can we trust.
When you think you have found that person, you can both examine the seven chakras on the body and make a commitment at the level of each chakra.
At the first chakra:
How are you going to help each other with your survival needs, your basic identity needs, and are you going to commit to each other in meeting your most fundamental needs? This is where you will learn if you have the foundation to keep building. Do you feel safe? Can you disclose yourself, who you really are, and not who you want others to see you as? Can you trust this person if you show your soft underbelly? This is what it’s all about, and you have to be willing to reveal yourself, and to talk about it – which can be scary and painful.
At the second chakra:
How are you going to embrace the Other for who he/she is – and all the gifts, blessings and curses? Are you willing to receive them and embrace them and commit to help the Other discover the fullness of their being?
At the third chakra:
How can you acknowledge, respect and contribute to each other’s power and expression in the world without feeling threatened by it?
At the fourth chakra, the heart:
How can you dedicate yourselves to practicing truth and the highest expression of love – love that is not conditioned by our upbringing, by mommy and daddy. Love is based on honoring the highest truth of what is emergent, whats trying to heal, whats dying, whats birthing and whats resurrecting? And where in the cycle are we in that? What do we call it if it had a title for this time?
At the fifth chakra: How can you respect each other’s truth and expression of that truth? Can you make a commitment to hear the other deeply, to be a good listener, to be a careful witness to yourself and your partner and invite eachother’s voices to be developed to its fullest, versus a hidden whisper for fear of offending, or allowing the fear of the unconscious to stifle one another’s power based on patterns of addiction and codependency.
At the sixth chakra:
How can you support each other’s vision of your journey in the world?
At the seventh chakra:
How can you have a joint spiritual practice?
Go through the seven levels of deep commitment for a fulfilling relationship.
If you have only six – say that at your second chakra, your sense of self, you don’t feel you are being received or respected by your partner – there's deepening and inquiry that can be lined into and explored there. A shared container can be opened to learn more about this feeling and then potential fears alive and perhaps some unspoken requests that can be made.
If you do the work at each of these levels, then you can water the kind of relationship that will thrive, even in the most challenging of times.
Many of us start out hoping we have found the most perfect partner out there and bounce around from person to person or in polyamory where we stay in a teenage developmental
We can become the right partner by going through this series of initiations.
This book is GOLD : Chakra authority Anodea Judith brings a fresh approach to the yoga-based Eastern chakra system, adapting it to the Western framework of Jungian psychology, somatic therapy, childhood developmental theory, and metaphysics and applying the chakra system to important modern social realities and issues such as addiction, codependence, family dynamics, sexuality, and personal empowerment.
Arranged schematically, the book uses the inherent structure of the chakra system as a map upon which to chart our Western understanding of individual development.
Each chapter focuses on a single chakra, starting with a description of its characteristics and then exploring its particular childhood developmental patterns, traumas and abuses, and how to heal and maintain balance.
Eastern Body Western Mind